• Dr Ashutosh Srivastava

Are you in the right relationship?

Being in relationship has its own benefits but sometimes when things turn ugly we start blaming everything for our failed relationship, be it our partner or circumstances or ourselves. However, break-ups don’t happen suddenly, you must have got signals about it earlier but you must have not given it the due importance and ignored it. The best way to deal with relationship problems is to act swiftly whenever you get any signal that something is going wrong. You should analyze the situation and problem and communicate with your partner about it.

Here are some points in regard to relationships which will give you a good idea about how healthy your relationship is:

Right attitude:

Accept the person as he is; don’t try to change the person as per your preferences and choices. When you enter into a relationship with someone, it means that you accept all his qualities, whether bad or good. You may try to convince the other person to change or get rid of any of his habit if it is harmful but forcing him would be absolutely wrong as you were aware about it from the very beginning.

Don’t force:

For example, if your partner smokes then you may try to make him understand the ill-effects of smoking and motivate him to quit smoking but forcing him will be considered as wrong. In the same manner, if a man knows that his partner doesn’t know how to cook, forcing her to cook food or start cooking will also be wrong.

Proof of love:

A partner should have faith in his partner and in his love and expecting that the other person should prove it regularly is certainly not correct. This also means that one of the partners has doubts regarding the sincerity and dedication of other partner concerning their relationship. These doubts will take the form of big problems in coming days and these should be cleared as soon as possible.

Express your love:

Lovers should also express their love by taking their partner out for romantic dates or outing or by giving gifts as it will not only strengthen their love and relationship but it will also not let any doubt crop up in the mind of other person. Spending some quality time with your loved one will also rejuvenate you and make you happy as well.

Facing the problems:

Problems are a part of our lives and whether we like it or not, we have to face them. Problem can be connected to one of the partners but those who are in love will face every problem together and will never leave their partner alone in any situation.

Don’t play the blame game:

However, if at any given point of time, a partner starts blaming his partner for the problem and tries to separate himself from it, then it means that they both need to think about their relationship. This type of relationship is not long lasting and if it doesn’t breaks now, then it will break in the future because it is not a strong or mature relationship.

Personal development of a person:

A true relationship is always constructive and a person grows not only in personal but also in professional capacity. If a person is in a strong and healthy relationship, he will look to improve himself professionally as well, he will develop his network and work hard to earn more to have a bright future. He will get ample support from his partner which will further boost his confidence and motivate him to achieve more in life.

In wrong relationship:

However, if you find that you are neither getting promotion nor increment in job nor you are happy at home, it means that you are stuck with a wrong person and taking a decision regarding the relationship is the need of the hour.

Emotional stable:

Your emotions for your partner should be stable and they should not flicker on the basis of situations or circumstances that you face in your life. If you are comfortable with your partner at one point of time then it seems quite irrational if you feel uncomfortable at some other time.

A fragile relationship:

In the same manner if you are excited and happy to be with your partner today but the very next day you feel like breaking up all the ties and get separate, then it means your relationship is not mature enough and it is fragile too.

Jealousy and faith:

Being concerned for your partner and being jealous are completely different aspects of a relationship. Many times, it has been seen that relationships get broken because of misunderstandings that took place because partners didn’t have enough faith in each other. If your partner is talking to some other person in a happy mood, it doesn’t mean that there is something wrong going on between them.

Give personal space:

You should give some personal space to your partner and make them believe that you have complete faith in them. In today’s world when both are working it is quite obvious that your partner will meet and work with different people, with some he may become friends but you should not doubt on them until and unless you get a solid reason for that.


Lies have no place in a true relationship and if you feel that your partner is constantly lying to you then you should take it seriously. You should talk to your partner about it and if he is not in the mood to correct himself than it will be beneficial for you to end this relationship and move on.

Mutual trust

A healthy relationship is always based on mutual trust and love and if these factors are missing from any relationship then it is highly impossible that it will last longer. Don’t waste your time and energy on a person who is not concerned about you and doesn’t gives you much importance.


Presence of love in a relationship is as important as breathing for a human being. A person will lose his life if he is not able to breathe, in same manner a relationship will also lose its importance if there is no love between them. Even if a couple fights a lot, it doesn’t means that they don’t love each other, it is just that they don’t know how to settle issues and they have been doing some things in a wrong manner.

Love is powerful:

Love makes people forgive their loved ones if they have committed some mistake but you should make sure that nobody takes undue advantage of your feelings. Love is the binding force which ensures that two people will stay together for whole life and not only share the happiness of life but will also fight the problems together.

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